Breastfeeding can be a bonding and beneficial experience for mom and baby – skin-to-skin contact and cuddles help your baby feel secure and comforted. While breastfeeding can be portrayed as a natural and easy process, for many new moms, it comes with challenges.
To help mothers navigate the difficulties, we talked to Mindy Cockeram, lactation consultant with Kaiser Permanente San Bernardino, who has decades of experience in the field, including leading breastfeeding courses and support groups. She shares insights and practical tips on breastfeeding and general feeding basics.
The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends babies receive breast milk for the first 6 months because of the health benefits, but sometimes that is easier said than done, right?
Mindy: Breast milk has many benefits, particularly to boost a baby’s immunity. As I like to say, breast milk is organic, made from scratch, toxin free, never gets recalled, and is free. Breastfeeding never results in overfeeding and the baby doesn’t take in as much air. For mom, it’s a great way to burn calories too.
There are also many mental health benefits – the physical closeness fosters a deep emotional connection between mother and baby, contributing to secure attachment and well-being for the child. It also affords moms calmness and relaxation. Lastly, the hormone oxytocin released during breastfeeding has mood-stabilizing and stress-relieving effects to help reduce anxiety and potentially lower the risk of postpartum depression.
But breastfeeding does not necessarily come easily for everyone. Many women must return to work and have difficulty pumping enough milk (called supply anxiety) while others experience pain – all of which may lead to feelings of inadequacy or frustration. The good news is there are options and if the baby is well fed and thriving, that’s all that matters.
Breastfeeding can be challenging. What are the most common challenges moms face, and how can they address them?
Mindy: It’s normal for new moms to feel overwhelmed or anxious by breastfeeding, especially in the early days. Guilt tends to arise when moms feel they’re not meeting their own or others’ expectations and is often amplified by the unrealistic expectation that breastfeeding should be effortless. Discomfort is another challenge, but making adjustments can make all the difference.
Breastfeeding is a learned skill for mother and baby, and it takes time. It’s important to give yourself grace. I recommend moms-to-be take a breastfeeding course as they prepare for the baby’s arrival. We often focus on childbirth, and that’s critical of course, but it’s one day while feeding is a longer investment and lays the foundation for a healthy start.
What are tips for pain or discomfort relief during breastfeeding?
Mindy: If you’re experiencing pain, the first thing to address is your baby’s latch, which is often the main cause of nipple pain. The baby’s mouth should cover the areola asymmetrically, not just the nipple, and you should feel a gentle pulling sensation rather than sharp pain. If you’re not sure about the latch, a lactation consultant can offer hands-on guidance.
Another tip is to try different positions to see which is most comfortable for you and the baby – sometimes a slight change can make a big difference. The positions which tend to offer the deepest latch are the “football hold” or the “laid-back” position. In both positions, the baby naturally gets a deeper latch.
Using gentle massage or warmth before feeding can help stimulate letdown. Engorged breasts may benefit from warmth before a feeding and a cold compress afterward to reduce inflammation. Also, it is okay to pump and bottle-feed or supplement with formula. However, women should learn to pace feed if they don’t want the baby to start to prefer the flow of the bottle over the breast and prevent overfeeding.
How can partners support breastfeeding moms during this time?
Mindy: Partner and family support can make all the difference. They can assist with burping, changing diapers and calming the baby. Ensuring mom stays hydrated and well-fed since breastfeeding requires extra calories and fluids is important too. Also, help with chores so mom can focus on feeding. It truly is a village, and breastfeeding is no exception.
What should new moms know about pumping and storing milk?
Mindy: Pumping is a viable option for mothers who can’t breastfeed. It also provides flexibility, but it isn’t for everyone. Not all women’s bodies respond to a pump, and one shouldn’t judge their supply by the amount they can pump. Some pumps remove as little as 50% of the total supply.
Pump in the morning when milk supply is typically at its highest and, if at work, try pumping at roughly the same intervals that your baby would normally feed. Label breastmilk with the date it was pumped. Freshly pumped milk can be stored at room temperature for up to 4 hours, in the refrigerator for up to 4 days, and in the freezer for about 6 months. Thaw frozen milk by placing it in the refrigerator or running it under warm water (microwave not recommended).
What about when breastfeeding isn’t an option and mom is using formula?
Mindy: It’s important to acknowledge that breastfeeding isn’t always possible or the right choice for every mom. Formula is a functionally nutritious alternative. What matters most is that your baby is well-fed and thriving, whether it’s through breast milk or formula. Ultimately, there’s no one-size-fits-all approach. What’s important is finding a feeding method that works for both you and your baby. Whether you choose breastfeeding, formula feeding, or a combination of both, your baby will thrive with the love, care, and nourishment you provide.
Any final words of encouragement?
Mindy: Trust yourself and trust your body. Every mom’s breastfeeding journey is unique, and it’s okay if things don’t go perfectly. If you are in pain, get help. Breastfeeding shouldn’t hurt. Remember that you are doing an amazing job just by caring for your baby and giving your best effort. Don’t hesitate to reach out for support and know that you’re not alone. With time, patience, and support, you and your baby will find your rhythm.
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Kaiser Permanente San Bernardino’s Mindy Cockeram has been educating women and their partners about childbirth and breastfeeding for 20 years. She certified with the National Childbirth Trust’s (NCT) Teacher Training College in the United Kingdom before relocating with her family to Southern California in 2010 where she certified with Lamaze International. She is also a Board-Certified Lactation Consultant. She teaches Breastfeeding with Success and Baby Care Basics classes and leads the Breastfeeding Support Group at Kaiser Permanente’s Center for Healthy Living.
