Anxiety about college starts early. For many, their first thought is, “What if I don’t get in?” What isn’t talked about as much is the genuine anxiety around “What if I do get in?” As a high school senior going through the application process, I’d like to offer both kids and their families some thoughts and best practices for navigating the natural anxious feelings that surround the prospect of this life change.
College is a scary concept: a new community, a new social scene, a new academic environment, and most importantly, new responsibilities. Getting accepted means there is a new wave of pressure. It’s not just writing essays and maintaining grades; you’re deciding your future. What major do I choose? What career path can I take? Is a loan worth it, or will I be bogged down in debt for many years to come? Which college will look the best on my resume, and does that even mean anything anymore? These questions swirl around high school seniors’ heads, and it is nearly impossible to find an answer.
Juggling these questions while managing the very real and ongoing pressures of the college application process itself can feel overwhelming. The college conversation starts so early – it’s been in my mind since 7th grade. Whether you’re at school or at home, there’s always that constant conversation that plants a seed in your mind about how important college is and how hard it is to get in, especially in Los Angeles. There is a culture in schools here where success is measured by academic triumph. Getting all A’s, the title of valedictorian, and 1600 on the SAT are amazing goals but very difficult to achieve. The societal expectation of having to receive all of the titles is stressful, and students should not be constantly told that this is their only chance at getting into college. I think of this stress split into three categories:
Societal pressure. Parental pressure. Competitive pressure.
I have learned that the best solution to manage anxiety is to have a plan. There is always more than one right answer, but I am sharing my plan in the hopes that it helps you and encourages you to create one for yourself.
5 tips to manage college application stress
- Make preliminary deadlines.
The college application process is made up of so many deadlines, which can be overwhelming. As an avid procrastinator, this can be challenging for me! I set personal deadlines before the actual deadlines. It prevents rushing towards the end, which can cause even more anxiety. Allowing myself more time also produces even better work.
- Work and talk with peers.
Competition around the college application and selection process can feel isolating, as if you cannot or should not talk about it to the people around you. But that’s not the reality of the situation. Nearly everyone in your grade is in the same boat and shares the same questions. Find a time to work with your friends on applications: go to the Los Angeles Public Library, meet in a classroom, grab a coffee and hone your applications together. Having people to talk to who are going through the same thing can provide relief from this stress.
- Find or create breaks.
With the never-ending workload of senior year and the process of filling out the Common Application, it can be hard to find time for yourself. It feels as if you are spending all of your free time polishing a draft or listening to a college podcast. Big tip: anxiety thrives in imbalance. To counter this, pick an activity you enjoy, preferably outside, and carve out time to do it (I love to take a walk on the beach). No excuses!
- Don’t think too far ahead.
The college you get into is not the end all, be all. It is a land of possibility. You can switch roommates, majors, or even transfer to another college. Anxiety cannot survive if you are living in the present, and college anxiety is no exception to that. Try meditation exercises on YouTube or even box-breathing for two minutes. Do not let anxiety prevent you from enjoying your last year of high school.
- Find a support system at the schools you are interested in.
Do some research! Most schools nowadays have counseling systems, support clubs or even workshops. This can help to alleviate the fears of being alone in college, as well as provide a place to ask questions.
Keep in mind, true beauty lies in the journey, not just the destination. We’ve got this!
Quincy Kadin is a high school senior, mental health advocate and author of Frankie’s Fishy Feelings.
